How to stay connected in a long-distance relationship

Being in a long-distance relationship means learning to love someone from afar.

Phone calls, messages and video chats become part of your routine. You learn the time difference and count down to the next visit. And you find ways to share the big moments, even when you can’t be there for the small ones.

But sometimes, it’s the small things you miss most.

Sitting next to each other on the sofa. Having a coffee together. Sharing a quick chat about something completely unimportant. Most of all, just being in the same place, without having to make plans for it.

Distance makes everyday moments harder to come by.

And while there’s no perfect substitute for being together, there are little ways to create a sense of closeness when you’re apart.

Staying connected when you’re far apart

When you can’t share the everyday moments, you have to find new ways to create them.

A photo from your walk. A message about something that made you laugh. Watching the same show. Sending each other a song.

It doesn’t take much time, but it creates a sense of being part of each other’s day. It invites the other person into the ordinary moments.

Play together, even when you’re apart

Online games let you bring this shared experience into a long-distance relationship. Your partner might be in the next city or on the other side of the world, but the board can still sit between you.

Playing games has always been a simple way to connect with someone. Distance doesn’t have to change that.

Because you don’t even have to play at the same time.

Make time without making a plan

One of the easiest ways to stay connected is to find something you can do together without needing to coordinate your calendars.

Pick a game and take your turn when you have a minute. Let them take theirs when they have time. Over breakfast, on the train, during a lunch break or before bed.

You make your move, your partner makes theirs when they have time. The game keeps going while life does too.

There’s no need to be online at the same time. No need to schedule a call. No need to finish a game in one sitting.

A game might take a few minutes, a few hours, a couple of days or even longer.

Keep a little thread running between you

A shared game can become a small ritual.

Play a game before bed. Start a new game every week. Keep one going throughout a busy period. Or simply make a move whenever you think of each other.

The point isn’t how often you play. It’s having something that belongs to the two of you.

And it gives you something to talk about, too.

You don’t always have to start with “How was your day?” You can complain about the dice, celebrate a comeback, tease each other about a terrible move, or simply pick up where you left off.

Sometimes a little bit of shared playfulness is all you need.

Why backgammon works so well

Backgammon is easy to pick up, but there’s enough strategy to keep things interesting. Every game is a little different. Sometimes you make a brilliant move. Other times, the dice have different plans.

And because you take turns, you have time to think. Or to send your opponent a message questioning their risky moves or suspiciously lucky dice.

It’s also a game that naturally works well at a distance. You don’t need to be sitting across the same table, and you don’t need to finish a game in one sitting.

That’s actually how bearoff started. We’re a long-distance couple who love playing backgammon, and we wanted a simple way to keep playing together when we couldn’t be in the same place.

So we built it.

Something to come back to

Long-distance relationships don’t need constant communication to feel close. They need small moments that make you feel part of each other’s lives.

Share the ordinary stuff. Find something you both enjoy. Create little rituals that belong to you.

And make them easy enough that you’ll actually keep doing them.

A game of backgammon can’t make the distance disappear, but it can give you somewhere to meet in between.

So make a move. And invite them to make theirs.